I honestly don't see why bringing a burner phone is so bad. I mean, my cell phone is a burner phone that I've had for about 11 years. And I don't do social media. Anyway, burner phones are good and useful.
I found yomu.ai . Scarily, I'm wondering if AI and political correctness are making satire more scarce and something to be feared. That would be a truly frightening, and unfunny, future.
BTW, I tried and entered "trump venous insufficiency". It came up with a slightly amusing article about his veins objecting to his spreading false information and trying to hold up the blood in revolt.